I thought of this brilliant post last week when I heard about this douche. The douche in question would be the guy who pretended the airplane he was flying was crashing and then wait.......drumroll...........he proposed!! WTF?!?!?! That is the stupidest shit I have ever heard. That is in no way romantic. Even dumber is the fact that this gal said yes.
That news story got me thinking about other dumb marraige proposals. Take 5 minutes to look it up online (it's worth a Google) and you will find hundreds of stories of stupid proposals: Jumbotron, tv appearance, half court at NBA game, flashmobs, and the list goes on and on.
Anyone besides me think these fools are just attention whores?!?! Why else would you take one of the most sentimental and personal moments of your life and broadcast it for everyone to see? I consider these attention whores on the same level as those people who videotape their water birth and put that shit on Youtube. Ain't nobody wants to see that. Ever. Not even in Health class. I wouldn't even watch a video of my ownself giving birth much less some other bitch I don't know.
Seriously, what is wrong with people!? But then again, attention whores are everywhere. Especially in the blogging world. These bloggers that have 2,000+ followers.........how? Why? I admit I follow some of them, but then I wonder why am I reading this shit?!!? I don't know this person from Adam.
I personally think the people with tons and tons of followers probably lead a far more fabulous life than I (or at least pretend to in cyber world). At the very least, they are cuter and wearer nicer clothes! I am surprised at how few followers I have??? What? You mean people don't want to hear stories about my kids semi-naked wrestling on the floor of the doctor's office? How I sat home all weekend in my PJs without so much as washing my hair or leaving the house?? You mean people don't find that fascinating? Oh well, at least that means I am not an attention whore! :)
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
Showing posts with label soapbox. Show all posts
Oct 5, 2012
Sep 13, 2012
How do you pronounce that?
I haven't always loved my name, but the longer I work in my profession the more I realize I'm blessed to have something that's normal, semi-common, and pronounceable. Doing this job, I see all kinds of names.....and a lot of them are REALLY REALLY bad. And really really unfortunate.
Due to confidentiality reasons, I can't reveal all of my client's lovely names. I totally wish I could. Trust me, you would laugh! Hysterically! But I can reveal that a reliable source told me yesterday about a new case that came through the Court and the child's name is.............. drumroll .......... LITHIUM! Seriously?? Isn't that something they put in batteries? Or gave crazy people back in the day as part of their crazy people therapy? What was this mother thinking? With a name like Lithium, this mother has severely limited her child's future job prospects. Top three career choices for Lithium whatsherlastname, Class of 2020: 1.) McDonald's cashier, 2.) Stripper, 3.) crack whore.
Then there is the story of the child in Dayton whose name was Chocolate Mattress.....but that's a whole other blog post!
Along that same line, if you haven't read the book Freakonomics, you should. They have an entire chapter on how naming your child affects the child's future. It's fascinating, and in my opinion, mostly true. I recently ran upon this other guy's article on ridiculous baby names and died laughing! It's all so true. I only wish I had written it myself, but alas I can't take credit. Trust me, you will pee your pants when you read it!
One day my children will thank me for names like Madeline, John and Evan. And don't even get me started on rhyming twin names.....I see that a lot in my job too! And that too, friends, is a whole other post for another day!
Due to confidentiality reasons, I can't reveal all of my client's lovely names. I totally wish I could. Trust me, you would laugh! Hysterically! But I can reveal that a reliable source told me yesterday about a new case that came through the Court and the child's name is.............. drumroll .......... LITHIUM! Seriously?? Isn't that something they put in batteries? Or gave crazy people back in the day as part of their crazy people therapy? What was this mother thinking? With a name like Lithium, this mother has severely limited her child's future job prospects. Top three career choices for Lithium whatsherlastname, Class of 2020: 1.) McDonald's cashier, 2.) Stripper, 3.) crack whore.
Then there is the story of the child in Dayton whose name was Chocolate Mattress.....but that's a whole other blog post!
Along that same line, if you haven't read the book Freakonomics, you should. They have an entire chapter on how naming your child affects the child's future. It's fascinating, and in my opinion, mostly true. I recently ran upon this other guy's article on ridiculous baby names and died laughing! It's all so true. I only wish I had written it myself, but alas I can't take credit. Trust me, you will pee your pants when you read it!
One day my children will thank me for names like Madeline, John and Evan. And don't even get me started on rhyming twin names.....I see that a lot in my job too! And that too, friends, is a whole other post for another day!
May 29, 2012
On my proverbial soapbox.....yet again
I feel like I alternate blog postings by either sharing my chidlren's most recent fiascos or complaining/or getting on my soapbox. Which is, in all honestly, what I do all day every day.....complain, argue, tell hilarious story about my kids, rinse and repeat!
Saw this little nugget last week on the Today Show (am I the only moron who yells at her tv when some news story upsets me!?!?):
In a nutshell, this gal calls off her wedding several months beforehand and the dude is suing her for her part of the money he shelled out. Is it just me or does anyone else think she ought to have to pay him back? She signed the contract to rent the place, the flowers, the DJ, etc. She should have to pay it back too! Why should he bear all the costs? Oh and she mysteriously withdrew of $50,000 from their joint bank account the day she dumped him! HO!!!
If you took the time to read the article or watch the clip, you will realize this story proves one thing: never trust an Ex-Hooters girl.....once a Hooters girl, always a Hooters girl. Watch the cinema classic Big Daddy if you don't believe me! :)
In a nutshell, this gal calls off her wedding several months beforehand and the dude is suing her for her part of the money he shelled out. Is it just me or does anyone else think she ought to have to pay him back? She signed the contract to rent the place, the flowers, the DJ, etc. She should have to pay it back too! Why should he bear all the costs? Oh and she mysteriously withdrew of $50,000 from their joint bank account the day she dumped him! HO!!!
If you took the time to read the article or watch the clip, you will realize this story proves one thing: never trust an Ex-Hooters girl.....once a Hooters girl, always a Hooters girl. Watch the cinema classic Big Daddy if you don't believe me! :)
May 16, 2012
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)